Monday, November 28, 2011

It's A Beautiful World

It's a wonderful life.
The aventura de la vida moves.
It swirls, it races, it dances, it sings. It's a shower of raindrops sparkling in sudden sunshine. It's a red leaf dropping to the ground. It's a flurry of white snow flakes. Always moving, always fresh, always active!
I love it.

Life is breathing and pulsing. Life is worth celebrating. Life is so much joy. It bubbles up from the deeps of my heart. And makes me want to smile!

Life is God.

And God is so good!
I will sing praise to the God most high. I will raise my hands to the heavens to acknowledge the power greater than I. I will use my tongue to bring praise to His name.
His ways are so much better than mine.
His blessings overflow.
His strength brings grace to my life.
His love is overpowering.

I wish I could find the words to express how I feel about how good God is. I wish I could reveal it all, I wish I could share the extent. I am continually amazed. Continually humbled. Continually glad to see the movement of God in my life.
But you will have to just experience it for yourself. Look for God in your life. Find the ways He moves and how He reveals Himself to you.

Sing praise!

Friday, November 25, 2011

Bits of Beauty

During a very hard time, it is nice to have a bit of beauty.
These were cast off roses from a wedding. I saved them and brought them home to enjoy.

Thursday, November 24, 2011



jars of clay
against the pavement
pieces lie
dry dust

beyond repair



Only through pain and suffering

Only through endless time

Only through

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

I Still Believe

Scattered words and empty thoughts
seem to pour from my heart
I've never felt so torn before
seems I don't know where to start
but it's now that I feel Your grace falls like rain
from every fingertip, washing away my pain

I still believe in Your faithfulness
I still believe in Your truth
I still believe in Your holy word
even when I don't see, I still believe

Though the questions still fog up my mind
with promises I still seem to bear
even when answers slowly unwind
it's my heart I see You prepare
but it's now that I feel Your grace fall like rain
from every fingertip, washing away my pain

I still believe in Your faithfulness
I still believe in Your truth
I still believe in Your holy word
even when I don't see, I still believe

The only place I can go is into Your arms
where I throw to you my feeble prayers
in brokenness I can see that this was your will for me
Help me to know You are near

I still believe in Your faithfulness
I still believe in Your truth
I still believe in Your holy word
even when I don't see, I still believe

I Still Believe. Jeremy Camp.

Monday, November 21, 2011


From the journal...

Heartbroken because my face is turned away.
Avoiding his eyes, walking a pathway
the opposite direction.

Heartbroken because my voice is quiet.
Silence filling the riot
of emotions.

Heartbroken because I do not believe
and there is nothing to relieve
the hurt.

If I feel this heartbroken over relationships and friendships that have seemingly gone astray, then how must my Lord feel when I forsake Him? When I forget Him, or fail to think of His part in my life?
How forsaken and hurt must He feel when I look for my fulfillment in other ways, with other things, idols that take up the room in my heart that should be His?
If I feel heartbroken over wrongs and hurts that really amount to nothing at all, how much more must He feel when I fail Him and hurt Him by hurting others?
If I feel heartbroken because I feel so much goodwill for someone who will not return it, how much more must He feel when He's the one that made me, and He's looking for my recognition and returning love?
If I feel heartbroken with disappointment because someone else fails me, how much more must He feel when I disappoint Him?

How much more so is my Lord.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Deep Within

Late have I loved you,
O Beauty ever ancient, ever new, late have I loved you!
You were within me, but I was outside and it was there that I searched for you.
In my unloveliness I plunged into the lovely things which you created.
You were with me, but I was not with you.
Created things kept me from you; yet if they had not been in you they would not have been at all.
You called, you shouted, and you broke through my deafness.
You breathed your fragrance on me; I drew in breath and now I pant for you.
I have tasted you, now I hunger and thirst for more.
You touched me, and I burned for your peace.
-St. Augustine


I am no longer my own, but thine.
Put me to what thou wilt, rank me with whom thou wilt.
Put me to doing, put me to suffering.
Let me be employed by thee or laid aside for thee, exalted for thee or brought low for thee.
Let me be full, let me be empty.
Let me have all things, let me have nothing.
I freely and heartily yield all things to thy pleasure and disposal.
And now, O glorious and blessed God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit,
Thou art mine, and I am thine. So be it.
And the covenant which I have made on earth, let it be ratified in heaven.

-A Covenant Prayer in the Wesleyan Tradition

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

The Trumpet Blast, The Call

The trumpet blast echoes through the valleys, across the fields. The leaves of the trees tremble at the notes, and the birds hush to hear it's voice.
It's a call to attention, a call to action.
The trumpet blast is a call to join the fight for the Kingdom.

Everyone has a calling from God to fulfill. Everyone has a job to do. Everyone should be responding to the call.
I've been struggling and wrestling this summer and especially the last few days and weeks with what my calling is. I've been exploring different options, searching my soul for answers and leading, and working toward a peaceful understanding of what pathway I'm to take, what action is mine to execute. I want to get it right. I know I'm called to something, and I know I have a mission to accomplish. I want to run the race and at the finish line look back and know I've done what God has asked me to do.
I don't want Him to ask someone else to do my job because I am shirking it.
The call is something deep within, something that He has created me to do, equipped me to do. Something that He can use to lead others to Him, something that will bring edification to myself and others.
The call cannot be denied. It is there, waiting, nudging, tugging. Ever present, it is like the echoes of the trumpet that rings in my heart and mind.
I cannot rest until the call is answered.

The call will bring fulfillment and peace. In responding to the call, I can know that I am an integral part of this universe, a piece to the puzzle, an armed warrior that helps to win the battle.

All I have to do is answer the call. All I have to do is obey the sound of the trumpet.

I still don't have the answers I would like to have. I still don't know exactly what I'm doing. But I know that in this journey of life, through the valleys and across fields God leads. Perhaps I will never gain a clear assurance of exactly what I am to do. But He will guide me, if only through a circuitous route. I have to wrestle with the call and do my best to answer.

The trumpet's notes ring out, calling to action all those who pause to listen and acknowledge it.
The trumpet's notes ring out, and I, must listen.

Saturday, November 12, 2011


Today I was thinking about how I like to worship in different languages.
I was remembering how last year I worshiped using the same song in 3 different languages in 3 different countries.

And then I thought about all the different languages and ways that God speaks to us and hears us.

It's kind of mind blowing, really.

Friday, November 11, 2011

Not Perfect

Today the subject of perfection came up.
And I was reminded that God does not need perfection from us in order to use us. He doesn't even need perfection to accept us.
The beauty of it is, God takes us where we are, and uses us despite the imperfections.
He even can use our imperfections to bring more glory that we would imagine when facing our brokenness.
A truth that is a mystery and a comfort and a beautiful thing.

I can never be perfect.
I can never attain perfection.
I can only strive for it and remind myself of God's acceptance that I am exactly the person He can use this moment.

Thanks be to God.

Thursday, November 10, 2011

What Faith Can Do

Everybody falls sometimes
Gotta find the strength to rise
From the ashes and make a new beginning
Anyone can feel the ache
You think it's more than you can take
But you're stronger, stronger than you know
Don't you give up now
The sun will soon be shining
You gotta face the clouds
To find the silver lining

I've seen dreams that move mountains
Hope that doesn't ever end
Even when the sky is falling
I've seen miracles just happen
Silent prayers get answered
Broken hearts become brand new
That's what faith can do

It doesn't matter what you've heard
Impossible is not a word
It's just a reason for someone not to try
Everybody's scared to death
When they decide to take that step
Out on the water
It'll be alright
Life is so much more
Than what your eyes are seeing
You will find your way
If you keep believing

I've seen dreams that move the mountains
Hope that doesn't ever end
Even when the sky is falling
I've seen miracles just happen
Silent prayers get answered
Broken hearts become brand new
That's what faith can do

Overcome the odds
You don't have a chance
(That's what faith can do)
When the world says you can't
It'll tell you that you can!

I've seen dreams that move the mountains
Hope that doesn't ever end
Even when the sky is falling
And I've seen miracles just happen
Silent pryaers get answered
Broken hearts become brand new
That's what faith can do
That's what faith can do!
Even if you fall sometimes
You will have the strength to rise


Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Looking At The Map

The adventure of life. Ever moving, ever changing the journey is continuing, and I'm still looking at the map.
The terrain of life changes so quickly. First it's smooth, then bumpy. Occasionally a hill or a mountain to climb. Sometimes a storm to trudge through, sometimes a cool breeze that makes the journey pleasant.
I was thinking today about the journey of life. And that map. I've got to figure out how to read this map, and it'd be helpful to know how to use the compass.

I was anticipating a decision I would make today. While small, it will impact the next 2-3 years and perhaps longer. I wasn't terribly nervous about this decision, but it was beginning to make me a little anxious. And then I got up to it, and it was easy.
The swells got smaller and were easy to climb.
Is that how life is?
Is it that you anticipate having to decide and anticipate trying to look for the correct path to take, when really it happens naturally? And the answer is before us?

I believe that God speaks to us, and helps us to know which choice to choose. I believe that God can take our choices and use them for the best. I believe that God allows us to choose the path.
So why do I stress over it? Especially since I know God is with me, and I know I hear His voice. If I just slow down and stop worrying, it usually all works out with little trouble.
It really does.

I'm looking at the map of this journey I'm taking. I'm checking for road signs to follow. I want to get to the goal, I want to reach the end of the journey and I want to have taken the roads and paths that were those God would be most pleased with.

I feel I'm at a crossroads of sorts. The road stretches in a few different directions I could take.
And I am willing to go down each of them, if that be where the map would point.

I'm looking at the map.
And I'm listening to where the directions say to go.

Here I am Lord,
send me.

Friday, November 4, 2011

A Small Delight

A quick view through my lens.

Don't the colors just grab you? The last couple of weeks over and over again I've delighted in color. On sunny days, the bright blue autumn sky against the yellows and reds. I notice it every day and it fills me with gladness. On rainy days, it saturates the colors and makes them stand out against the drabness of the day. And those beautiful colors bring the sunshine that the sky is lacking.

God colored my world so beautifully. I think the older I get, the more I notice and enjoy it. It's a small thing, but I'm glad that I can see these colors and appreciate them.

Praise the Lord. Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever. Who can proclaim the mighty acts of the Lord or fully declare his praise? -Psalm 106:1-2

Thursday, November 3, 2011

The Heart's Cry

I've been thinking about breath prayers all week long.
A breath prayer is a short phrase your heart can pray with each breath. Something easy, like this:
"Lord have mercy, Christ have mercy, Lord have mercy." or "Christ, I give myself completely to you." or any short phrase that is easy to remember and can quickly bring help. Here are a few more I use sometimes:

"Thank you, Jesus."
"Christ, hear my cry."
"Jesus I am yours."

Breath prayers are good to try to use, especially if it's a particularly stressful day or situation. I write them down and put them where my eye will fall on it and remind me to pray them. Then throughout the day, with each breath I am in a praying mode.
Pray without ceasing, the Bible says. I would love to get into the habit of prayer being the first thing to which I turn. I want my heart to be speaking with God before I do anything. I want my heart to be constantly listening for His voice.
Sometimes breath prayers help me in all the loud noisiness of life to remain focused on who is really important. And in moments of trouble or fear, they bring me back to the reality of a bigger force, a higher calling, a larger picture.

"Lord, hear my prayer."

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

A Birthday Wish

Happy Birthday Daddy. I love you!
I wonder where I'd be if you didn't lovingly guide me and teach me.
I wonder where I'd be if you didn't show me what a Dad is like.
I wonder where I'd be if you didn't demonstrate character.
I wonder where I'd be if you didn't love my Mama.
I wonder where I'd be if you didn't love me no matter what.

Thank you Dad, for all you've done for me.
Know it?